Source: Come and get stoned with me !
“Whoever can see through all fear will always be safe. ~Tao the Chang “(Orloff, 2000, p.155)
Everyday we must make the decision to use our intuition in order to help ourselves. One way of accessing our intuition is to be centered which means “finding the still point inside, no matter what is happening” ( Orloff, 2000) p. 156). We must also protect ourselves from any negativity or threat such as dealing with an angry boss, annoying mother-in law, manipulative spouse etc. We have seen this played over and over again and we know exactly what is going to happen. How do you protect yourselves from people who drain your energy? Wouldn’t it feel good to arm yourself with tools to help you block this energy?
For many years, we experience so many emotional,physical, spiritual challenges that knocks us out. For some time, we realize that these emotions such as depression, anxiety, and envy take over our lives. You didn’t get any respect from your boundaries and yes it took some time for you to get back on your feet. Now let’s get some help for you to protect yourself now.
Notice Your Beliefs
Begin to ask yourselves what are my triggers? When life steals your joy, how do you deal with this? How could you protect yourself? We need to call on our inner self for guidance, by connecting with this part of yourself so that you can feel more confident. Resilience is the key to get through these feelings so that you can keep all negativity away.
The following are some common beliefs that deplete your energy:
- I’m not strong enough This is a lie that we tell ourselves every day and we need to believe in ourselves. When was the last time you actually looked in the mirror and said ” I love you?”
- Other people’s negative thought destroys me.- Yes, this is an area that we all need to be aware of when someone’s negative energy take over. We must know how to deflect this energy and ask it to leave. Avoid dwelling on what was said and do not pay any attention to negativity. The more you feed into negativity the more it destroys you. Focus on your strength within yourself and block it.
- I’m so sensitive Well, aren’t we all sensitive? If we realize that we have a thin skin, then make sure to run when it get to be too much. If we stick around, we will become overwhelmed and we need “to teach ourselves how to remain vulnerable and feel safe. And this doesn’t mean that we shut our sensitivity off but to develop it as a creative resource.” (Orloff,2000, p. 159).
- We often take on the pain of others If you are a very compassionate person, you are deeply affected by the pain of others. But we need to realize that we can’t help everyone. It’s natural to want to help a homeless person, a hurt child etc. We must be a supportive person that will not take on the pain of others. Yes, it hard to see others suffering, but we need to respect the fact that they need to go through this process. No matter how much we feel we can do for others, but just the act of doing too much hinder us. We can be caring, thoughtful and honest with our feelings. Lastly, don’t get carried away, preserve your energy so that you can have some balance in your life.
Step 2. Be in your Body
We need to be aware of our body and how it is affected when we are experiencing various emotions. Sometime we feel tension or pain in our back, a headache etc. We need to center our body at all times such as “exercise, hiking, dancing, yoga, pedicure, long bubble bath etc. Getting a massage, going for a walk,spending some time with your pets, gardening and listening to nature are great ways to help. Here are some suggestions by Dr Orloff:
Techniques for centering
Watch your diet- I know we hear this over and over again. But it’s true, we need to watch what we put into our mouths. For instance, today I wanted to get a subway tuna sandwich, but instead I made salad with grapes and strawberries.
Do mundane tasks- For instance, if you are shopping concentrate on the task at hand.
Practice anonymous service- Helping a neighbor, hold the door for an elderly person, Let someone go ahead of you. Volunteer at an homeless shelter and serve food etc.
Spend time in nature- This is one of my favorite activities which include just going to the part, walking by the lake, listening to the birds while on the porch, go to the beach, listen to the waves etc. Water is a great source to soothe you and purify yourself.
Mediate- Yes, we all hear about this and yes it was not easy to mediate the first time, but with practice we need to sit still and focus on our breath. If you are cramp for time, I would suggest just sit back, close your eyes and inhale peace and exhale frustrations etc. Complete a body scan that include focusing on your feet and work yourself all the way up to the crown of your head.
Step 3. Sense your Body’s Subtle energy
When we were younger, we find ourselves enjoying going to the mall, parties, etc, but we may realize that we didn’t really want to do this. After sometime, we begin to feel overwhelm and exhausted around groups and we begin to ask what is wrong with me? If you are like me, I suspect that we soak up the energy of the people around us. I also began to realize that I can feel what someone else is feeling both physically and emotionally. Dr Orloff stated that ” the more people per square foot, the more our energy fields intersect–thus the tendency to become overloaded in high-density areas. This aspect of intuition is the most neglected and misunderstood.” (Orloff, 2000, p. 163).
Four ways to avoid absorbing other’s people energy
- Walk away This may seem rude at first, but with practice we need to walk away when we realize that this situation is taking away our energy.
- Shield yourself Yes, it is important to protect yourself such as if someone is upset, you need to take a deep breath and center yourself. No, this is not being selfish, but it helps to place yourself in bubble so that we don’t absorb their energy.
- Practice vulnerability – “Too often we are taught to equate vulnerability with weakness. Not so, I like being vulnerable and also strong. This disarms people.” (Orloff,2000, p. 166).
- mediate Practice daily mediation which helps you to connect with yourself.
Step 4. Ask for Inner Guidance
At times no matter what we do, we first need to ask for guidance for everything. So take a breath, center yourself and ask for guidance from the Lord. Set aside the excuses that we often lets us missed a great opportunity to receive guidance. Give it a try to see what happens. It takes a lot of practice and patience so don’t give up on yourself.
Step 5. Listen to your Dreams
We often go to sleep at night and wake up to some nightmare or we can’t seem to shut off our thoughts. Dreams are way of telling you something that may help you in your life. Don’t be troubled my your dreams. Continue “to cultivate inner peace and resolve, strengths that come forth invisibly. There’s nothing like a little centeredness to
Orloff, J. (2000). Guide to Intuitive Healing. 5 Steps to Physical, Emotional, and Sexual Awareness.
In honor of suicide prevention awareness month, I wanted to share about Depression and how it affects us all. Yes, there are several people who are suffering in silence due to not wanting to burden their loved ones which their problems. But, I wanted you to know that you are not alone and together we can cope and live a better life.
Did you know that “suicide is the third leading cause of death in the U.S. among young people and the there are a variety of mental health conditions that affect people who are very vulnerable” (NAMI, 2015).
Lets review some of the warning signs of suicide
- Mood swings
- talking, writing or thinking about death
- increase in alcohol and drug use
- aggressive behavior
- isolate from friends, family and community
- impulsive behavior
Let’s review if there is an imminent danger?
- Saying goodbye to friends and family
- Mood shifts from despair to calm
- planning to borrow, steal or buy tools to commit suicide
Mental health professionals such as your primary care physician, psychiatrists,psychiatric or mental health nurse practitioners are trained to assess if you are at risk. The first step is to acknowledge that you cannot do this by yourself and give yourself permission to get the help that you need. We may believe that we can handle this, but a therapist will be able to help you understand so that you can cope with your thoughts and feelings.
This blog was inspired after reading a guest post on a blog that you can find here at this link http://www.drchristinahibbert.com/blog/ . A husband (Brandon) shared a story about his wife Naomi who had a long history of troubles. In any marriage there are good times as well as bad times and Brandon got engaged to his wife after knowing her for 3 to 4 months. The story begins with the loss of their baby boy who had down syndrome. This loss was very devastating for his wife and Brandon wanted to share the story of his wife so that it can help others. Patience is not easily acquired, but with persistence we need to encourage one another to talk to someone if they are experiencing depression. Yes, it’s easy to say, I don’t feel like they understand. But, know that you haven’t given yourselves the chance to let someone hear your story. Yes, it may be painful, but when we hold unto our thoughts this will do nothing for us but bring us downhill. My plea as Brandon mentioned in his blog post is for you to talk to someone about whatever is going on with you. If you are depressed, grieving, sad, lonely….please call someone. There is hope for you and me so ask and you shall receive it.
If you need to talk to someone please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 800-273-8255
Here’s a link to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention where I am a field advocate in the state of Kansas.
https://www.afsp.org/. This organization has a variety of events and I will be participating in a Community walk in Kansas to raise funds for suicide prevention.
Hibbert, C. (2015). Depression, Loss & A Grieving Husband’s Plea: “Too Short a Fairy Tale, by Brandon Gerdes.” Retrieved on September 20, 2015 from http://www.drchristinahibbert.com/blog/
National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI).(2015). Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. Retrieved on September 20, 2015 from https://www.nami.org/suicideawarenessmonth/hp
You never know what the Lord has in store for you. Be patient and wait on him. Enjoy the rebloged entry.
Four years. We spent four years trying to get pregnant. Every last hope. Every last wish. Everything I ever wanted hinged on having children. I wanted a baby so bad.
Anyone who has struggled with infertility knows the cycle of emotions. Shame. Pain. Embarrassment. Hope. Disappointment. Hope. Disappointment. Jealousy. Shame for feeling jealous. Hope. Disappointment. Anger. Sadness. Depression. Round and round it goes.
The emotions are suffocating. And so, so lonely. Because it is such a hard thing to deal with it’s an even harder thing to talk about. Infertility is very isolating. Every time I hear of someone who has been ‘trying to get pregnant’ I am taken back to the place of isolation. I feel those emotions again: the sadness- deep and aching and I long to say, “I get it.” But having a baby after struggling with infertility boots you from the club. Yes I can relate…
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Each year we recognize PTSD in the month of June and as we enter a new month, I would like to focus on understanding PTSD.
The U.S Department of Veterans Affairs provides a definition of PTSD that occurs “when a person experience a traumatic event such as combat, assault or disaster which most people have some stress reactions after trauma that lingers for some time” (U.S Department of Veterans Affairs, 2015). There are several types of trauma that includes war, terrorism,violence and abuse and disasters.
Effects of PTSD and the Family
It can be very difficult to live with someone who has been diagnosed with PTSD and often your daily life is disrupted by nightmares, avoiding crowds, and difficulty driving. The children at times have a lot of trouble in schools and PTSD affects the relationship with their spouse, family members and friends. There is also a list of common reactions of family members of a person with PTSD that includes sympathy, negative feelings, avoidance, depression, anger and guilt, variety of health problems.
At times family members neglect themselves and spend a lot of time taking care of their loved ones with PTSD which is a set up for failure. It is important to seek help and surround yourself with others who understand what you are going through.
What can providers do to support family members?
Family members often neglect themselves and are confused about what to do when they find out that their loved one has PTSD. As a clinician, we must educate the family members and let them learn more about trauma and its effects. It will take some time to learn about PTSD which can be overwhelming, but if you are not aware of what PTSD is and its effects then you will be lost. It also takes a lot of patience to help someone who is affected by PTSD and in time they will heal. There also various classes that are offered to help the family which includes stress and anger management, addiction, couples communication or parenting (Carlson,E & Ruzek, J,2014).
Help to spread the awareness of PTSD by printing this PDF flyer: http://www.ptsd.va.gov/about/ptsd-awareness/RaisePTSD_Awareness.pdf
Follow this link for a About Face PTSD videos on Youtube:
Follow this link provided by the Defense Centers for Excellence – PTSD Fact Sheet.
Carlson,E.B (PhD), & Ruzek, J.(PhD). (2014) PTSD and The Family. Retrieved from http://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/treatment/family/ptsd-and-the-family.asp
Defense Centers of Excellence. (2015) PTSD Treatment Options. Retrieved from http://www.dcoe.mil/PsychologicalHealth/PTSD_Treatment_Options.aspx
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs.(2015). Promotional Materials and Tips to Raise Awareness. Retrieved from http://www.ptsd.va.gov/about/ptsd-awareness/promo_materials_awareness.asp
Postpartum Depression(PPD) – What is this?
The birth of a baby can trigger a variety of emotions that includes excitement, joy, anxiety and fear. However, it can also trigger depression. For new moms who experience baby blues after a childbirth that includes feeling moody and crying a lot which subsides very quickly. There is also a more severe form of depression known as Postpartum Depression which develops after childbirth.
The Postpartum depression (PPD) includes the appearance of baby blues at first, but the feeling intensifies and last for a while that interferes with your ability to care for your child. Some of the symptoms of PPD includes lack of appetite, lack of sleep, getting angry easily, very overwhelmed, loss of sexual desire, sadness, feeling ashamed and guilty, severe mood swings, and a hard time connecting with your baby. If PPD isn’t treated it can last for several months. Whenever you are feeling depressed after a delivery, do not be ashamed. Reach out to your doctor or connect with a mental health professional that knows about PPD. If you feel as if you are getting worse and finding it hard to take care of your baby, hard to keep up with your activities and having thoughts of harming yourself or your baby, please seek medical attention.
Some of the treatment of PPD includes four categories such as Self-help, Psychotherapy, mediation and alternative treatment. There are several new moms who are suffering in silence, but there is hope for them. According to Dr. Hibbert who quoted from the Postpartum Support International, “You are not alone. You are not to blame. With help, you will be well.” (Hibbert, C,2015).
Get the facts about Perinatal Mood & Anxiety Overview
Are you feeling depressed, worried, anxious or panicky, trouble eating or sleeping, having upsetting thoughts that you can get rid of in your mind, worried about hurting your baby? If you believe you have any of these symptoms, this could indicate that you have Perinatal Mood or Anxiety Disorder such as Postpartum Depression. It is best to inform yourself while you are pregnant so that you can get the help you need.
Tools for Moms
The following is a list of tool that is helpful for moms that includes:
- The Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale (EPDS) see link here http://www.beyondblue.org.au/resources/for-me/pregnancy-and-early-parenthood/edinburgh-postnatal-depression-scale
The Online PPD Support Group which provides peer support, chat rooms, posting boards etc follow the link here http://postpartumdepression.yuku.com/
Text4Baby is a free text messaging tool that pregnant and new moms can use. Each week new moms gets a free text message to assist you through your pregnancy and the first year of the birth of your baby. In order to sign up, please TEXT …BABY to 511411 or Envia….BEBE al 511411 para Espanol.
Hibbert, C. (2015). Postpartum Depression Treatment. Retrieved from http://www.drchristinahibbert.com/postpartum-depression-treatment/
Mayo Clinic Staff. (2015). Postpartum Depression:Definition. Retrieved from http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/postpartum-depression/basics/definition/con-20029130
Postpartum Support International. (2015). Pregnancy and Postpartum Mental Health. Retrieved from http://www.postpartum.com/Get-the-Facts.aspx
Postpartum Support International. (2015). Tools for Moms. Retrieved from http://www.postpartum.com/Get-the-Facts/Tools-for-Moms.aspx